“You can do nothing to change the past, and the future will never come exactly as you expect or hope for. There have never been past warriors, nor will there be future ones. The warrior is here, now. Your sorrow, your fear and anger, regret and guilt, your envy and plans and cravings live only in the past, or in the future.” Says Socrates to Dan
“Hold on, Socrates. I distinctly remember being angry in the present.” says Dan.
“Not so,” said Socrates. ”What you mean is that you acted angry in a present moment. Action always happens in the present, because it is an expression of the body, which can only exist in the here and now. But the mind is like a phantom that lives only in the past or future. Its only power over you is to draw your attention out of the present.”
This is an excerpt from Dan Millman’s life changing book “The Way of the Peaceful Warrior.” A book I have read many times, and a movie I have watched just as many.
This past week I had the absolute privilege to be a part of Dan’s Peaceful Warrior Courage Training. I always make my best effort to go into a workshop with no expectations, and this one was no different. Thursday night however, I thought to myself this really isn’t what I expected: spending almost four days learning Kali (Sayoc Kali is an edged weapon based style of Filipino Martial Arts) was definitely NOT what I had expected.
Through the teachings of Dan and his amazing team of instructors, I learned much more than yielding and avoiding a knife.
On Saturday in one of our small group sessions, we were tested on what we had learned so far. My group was made up of 6 strong men, and little ole me, the only woman. I had worked hard and been present during all our lessons, yet my perception was that I failed miserably in this particular exercise. Later that night after some heartfelt sharing from some of the instructors I was brought to tears. I left and went up by the labyrinth and cried deeply, you know one of those ugly cries – that was me. I allowed all the emotions to flow, the pain that I was experiencing in that moment. The word FAILURE kept coming up over and over again. In that moment I realized how much I see myself as a failure in so many ways, and all the times it has surfaced and resurfaced. Anger turned inwards, frustration that keeps me back. After about 40 minutes of this, Dan’s words gently poured into my soul, words I too share with many others… “Lee, these are real emotions, your task is to breathe through them and not judge or resist, let them be.”
Thich Nhat Hanh shares with such eloquence what I am trying to say from this excerpt from his book “You are here”.
“When you are dealing with pain, with a moment of irritation, or with a bout of anger, you can learn to treat them in the same way (gentleness, respect, nonviolence, and tenderness.) Do not fight against pain; do not fight against irritation or jealousy. Embrace them with great tenderness, as though you were embracing a little baby. Your anger is yourself, and you should not be violent toward it. The same thing goes for all emotions.”
Sunday morning, my eyes still quite sore from my crying session the night before, we faced our TEST… 38 of us, all in different ways were fearful, anxious and worried that we may possibly fail. We started with the opportunity to practice the 4 minute Peaceful Warrior Workout – everyone was doing this, and in that precise moment I knew what I had to do – Be present in the here & now and breathe. So that’s what I did, closed my eyes and went through the motions completely present in the moment, relaxed, calm and focusing only on my breath.
Our test comprised of 3 knife wielding assailants (brilliantly portrayed by our Instructors) coming at us yelling, screaming and with full force. The object of the test: to be present, breathe and elegance.
A calmness swept over me as my name was called out. I faced Dan and the 6 instructors and bowed to show respect and that I was ready to begin. I vaguely recall Aly, Tim & Mike coming at me, what I do remember is being completely in that moment. At the end Dan said “Pass, that was elegance.” Next thing I remember I sat down next to Tom and he said “You should have seen yourself, that was incredible.”
As I watched the replay I was mesmerized with the presence I displayed, and the sense of being completely relaxed. As others came up to me and let me know that they were impressed by my presence, I shared with some what had gone on the night before, much to their surprise.
A huge thank you to the Westerbeke Ranch family, what an amazing location to be present in, divine food and beautiful energy.
Photo by Tamsin - Entering Westerbeke
Photo by Tamsin
We were gifted with the presence of turkey vultures flying around in their magnificence, and entertained by the many ravens and sounds of birds
One of my favorite places was the Labyrinth, a place of peace, quiet and reflection.
The divine food by Carol - Photo by Ron
Our training room (no not the pool to the right) Photo by Tamsin
And to all the participants, many I know will be lifelong friends.
There wasn’t a BIG high at the end of the training… what I felt was a a Peaceful Heart & a Warrior Spirit – The Way of the Peaceful Warrior. What I gained is much more than what I already had: a gentle, yet strong presence – a release.
“Stress happens when the mind resists what is; so let go of opinions about what should or shouldn’t be. Accept reality as it arises – take what is given and make use of it in your own way.” ~ Dan Millman ~
Hugs & Love
