Leaving a legacy of giving back

Have you ever thought of the legacy you will leave behind when your days come to an end?

What will people say about you?  What will they remember?

This is one lesson that I learned from Terry Lige: to be aware of the legacy I want to leave behind when I die, live it and breathe it…

This personal share from my dear friend Natasja Fischer of Symmetry Works is a beautiful example of the power of a legacy.  How the love, generosity, kindness and actions of her wonderful Grandparents lives on through her and others whose lives they touched.

An invaluable lesson taught to me by My Golden Hearts – My Grandparents

by Natasja Fischer

The Program ‘Who do you think you Are’ has a tag line that says:

To know who you are, you have to know where you come from.

 

Though I have not been blessed to have parents in my present life experience, I knew the love of my grandparents.

They were always there for me (for us), but really stepped up when their son Edward (my father) took his life in 1984.

They taught me so many things, but the most important thing they taught me, was To Give.

 

On the outside, their life to some may seem ordinary, but to know their life, was nothing less than extraordinary.

They lived a simple and quiet life in Zelma – a place so small, it is not considered a town, but a hamlet.

They went to Church in Young every week.

They washed their laundry together on a ringer-washer and hung it on the clotheslines each and every Monday.

They got the paper delivered to them by their neighbor and friend Mr.Shout, every day when he was done with it at lunchtime.

Supper was at 5:00 sharp every day.

 

They grew flowers and fruit and their garden was 60 feet wide by at least 120 feet long.

They did not need that amount of food, but they grew it because they had the land.

It was just what they did, it gave them a purpose, and it enabled them to share one of the most precious things (outside of love and time) – food.

 

Surviving a depression, they never forgot what it was like to ‘not have’ and ‘to go without’, so they shared what ever they had to give throughout their entire lives.

 

I never left their home without a trunkful of food and household goods.

I didn’t buy laundry soap until I moved to Calgary.

No matter who you were, you never left empty handed or empty hearted.  They loved like no other.

 

They were nominated for this award by a single mother that lived in Zelma for a number of years, and though she had moved away from Zelma with her 3 children, she never forgot how they helped her family, so when she came across an add in a newspaper about a program that Air Canada launched looking for people who improved the quality of life of others around them, she shared her story.

 

My grandparents got to know this woman through her children.  One of the boys had come down to see if my grandpa could put some air in one of his bike tires.  Through this simple interaction, they quickly built a relationship with the entire family.

 

Here are just a few things that they did:

My grandmother was very saddened when she discovered what these kids had in their ‘lunch pails’.  And so, from that day forward, she made 3 lunches every school morning for over 4 years.

My grandfather and his little brother Garet, were the handy men for countless things.

If my grandmother got wind of a problem or an issue, like the appliances, the roof, the furnace. They were summoned to go & give it a look.

They watched the kids when their mom had to go to Saskatoon.

Every Easter, my grandfather always included them in his chocolate bunny purchases.  No one ever went without a birthday cake and card.

 

My grandparents’ list of contributions to their communities only grew.  If there was a funeral, you can guarantee that you’d be getting a delivery of baked goods along with a lot of love and support.

 

Their love and efforts benefited countless people that spanned decades – Not a bad legacy to be a part of!

 

In my life, and in my work, I know and practice giving back.  Symmetry Works from day one has had a Pay It Forward Policy.

My clients unwanted items are donated when ever possible so that they can be given new life from someone else that can benefit.

 

Many times people do not realize how the simplest things can benefit others.  Old blankets and towels can be given to animal shelters and rescue groups.

Art supplies, board games and costumes be given to a school or a number of programs.

You just have to ask around, and you’ll find someone.

 

I think of my grandparents so often, but the intensity increases the closer we get to summer.

It’s the time when I get to dig in the dirt and tend to my flowers.

When I’m working with the soil, enjoying the sounds of nature in my yard, connecting with the earth, I inadvertently am connected to them.

Sharing meals and time with clients and friends outside, puts me in a state of gratitude and I’m able to connect with the peace and the purpose that they lived so purely.

 

Their awards and the golden heart pins that they each received made them feel so proud!

I now am the proud owner and keeper of these precious artifacts.

 

Each time I wear one of the pins, I walk a little taller and my heart grows a little bigger, as I know the best lessons are the ones I was taught by them… And I will forever be grateful to have come from them, and to have been loved by them.

 

The best way I can honour their legacy, is to do what they taught me so that they can live on.

Live, Love, Have Faith, Give thanks and Give and Share what ever you can – always!

What is the legacy you wish to leave behind?


Hugs & Love


 

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Sandra’s Butterfly – In Loving Memory Of Sandra

Almost a year ago today I saw Sandra for the last time before she peacefully passed away on March 25, 2011 with her Mom, Dad and Sister by her side.

It is a day I will never forget – accompanied by the magical Susanne Alexander-Heaton (dressed up as the “S” Faery) together Sus and I brought peace, magic, faery dust and love to Sandra.

 

This morning I revisited the beautiful place that Sandra called home for the last four weeks of her life – the Salvation Army Agape Hospice.

Arriving, I felt a sense of peace, a fond love and deep gratitude.

 

The reason for my visit, was to pay respects and view Sandra’s Butterfly.  This butterfly, thanks to hundreds of loving, generous people, many of whom never knew Sandra, donated to raise just over  $10,000 in loving memory of Sandra.

As I spoke with two ladies who work at Agape, one I fondly remember – I shared with them my heartfelt gratitude for all they did for Sandra, her family and friends.   The ladies shared that they fondly remembered the beautiful gift that Michael Buble gave to Sandra by singing her a song and sending her a message.

 

Personally, my time spent at Agape with Sandra, gifted me peace with death. Finding solace that there is a place that provides such love, dignity and care for the dying.

In loving memory of Sandra I just voted for Agape to say thank you to the loving work all the staff and volunteers do at Agape …
Vote for Agape by clicking on this link: What Gives YYC.

 

Today, I feel truly peaceful…  The days that my grief is all encompassing are fewer and farther in between.  Even though Sandra is not here beside me in physical form, she is ALWAYS here in spirit, guiding and loving me.  She is definitely a big part of the courage and brave steps for publishing my book and my advocacy for mental illness and suicide prevention, as she had lost her sister to suicide a year before my attempts on my life.

 

On Sunday, March 25th 2012 – I ask you to stop for a moment and send a loving prayer and healing thoughts to Sandra’s parents and sister.  Also to all Sandra’s extended family and dear friends who feel the loss of her kind, loyal, creative and unconditional friendship and presence.

 

What better way to fondly remember than to watch and listen to the lovely message Michael sent to Sandra, granting her dying wish that he sing to her…

 

Hugs & Love

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Gaining strength and wisdom in numbers

Ever tried doing something alone, thinking that you’re the only person on this planet feeling the way you do?

For the most part I involve many people in inspiring me, and supporting me in moving forward.  Some areas of my life I am better at this than others.  One area of my life that I’m not so great in this, is in business.

I am really great at supporting and providing mentorship, advice (when asked) and support to others.  When it’s time for the focus on me, I become uncomfortable and play small.  Going easily into overwhelm at all the pressure I put on myself.  When all it can take is the collaborative efforts and feedback of a group of people that can bring me back to reality and focus.

In coaching one of my favorite exercises with clients was the Mentor’s Table.  Inviting at least  three people you look up to, into your conscious mind and to ask their support and opinions in a visualization exercise.

Who would be on your mentor’s table?

What’s even better as a step up, is to have a real life Mentor’s Table.  A group of people to run ideas off, gain insight and clarity, ask for honest feedback and at times – lift you up and empower you when you’re ready to give up.  Some may relate this to a Mastermind Group.  Yesterday I had the opportunity to be part of an incredible group of brilliant minds.  An opportunity created by Tad Hardgrave of Marketing for Hippies.  What unfolded for me personally was an outpouring of bonding, wisdom, ideas, powerful questions, kindness, honesty and support.  I could really keep going with the gifts I received.

Last night when I arrived home I was exhausted, my mind had been stimulated, my emotions and spirit released and felt heard.  Instead of logging on to technology I reflected on the wise, incredible notes from all who were there yesterday.  The words of wisdom, kindness, and support touched my heart to the core.  I took the time to journal and look within my heart and listen.  I am eternally grateful for all the kind souls present yesterday Jill Ethier of Unleash Your Greatness, Kristin AllenCharlotte Lammerhirt,  Jackie Dumaine and Gemma Stone who hosted this amazing gathering and provided the healthiest, most delicious lunch I have ever had.  Also to Tad’s Guest participants and faculty who brought such incredible insights, experience and knowledge Javan BernakevitchKurt Archer and Rob Sinclair.  Thank you guys, you ROCK!

This morning as I opened my inbox, Tad had sent me an email, directly related to the question I posed to the group yesterday.  He sent me the link to Your deepest wound is your niche after reading it, and the great case studies he shared I didn’t feel so alone.

 

Who are you gaining strength and wisdom from?

“My opinion, my conviction, gains immensely in strength and sureness the minute a second mind has adopted it.”
~
Novalis (1772 – 1801), German Author and Philosopher ~

 

Hugs & love

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Don’t keep your heart hidden away

There is a beauty and brilliance that you were born to shine bright & steady.

Are you keeping it hidden away?

Reveal YOUR beauty, YOUR love, and YOUR heart TODAY….

 

 

 

Hidden Away by Josh Groban

Over mountains and sky blue seas
On great circles, will you watch for me?
The sweetest feeling I’ve got inside
I just can’t wait to get lost in your eyes

And all these words that you meant to say
Held in silence day after day
Words of kindness that our poor hearts crave
Please, don’t keep them hidden away

Sing it out so I can finally breathe in
I can take in all the same
Holding out for something I believe in
All I really need today

I want to free your heart, I want to see your heart
Please, don’t keep your heart hidden away

You’re a wonder, how bright you shine
A flickered candle in a short lifetime
A secret dreamer that never shows
If no one sees you then nobody knows

And all these words you were meant to say
Held in silence day after day
Words of kindness that our poor hearts crave
Please, don’t keep them hidden away

Sing it out so I can finally breathe in
I can take in all the same
Reaching out for someone I believe in
All I really need today

I want to feel your love, will you reveal your love?
Please, don’t keep your love hidden away
I want to free your heart, I want to see your heart
Please, don’t keep your heart hidden away

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What is your definition of happiness?

What is your definition of a happy life?

Are you living it?

As I turned my “Happiness Now Perpetual Flip Calendar” to today, January 14, by the delightful englishman, Robert Holden Ph.D. I was filled with such thought-provoking reflection.

“Are you living it?” jumped out at me.

What is my definition of a happy life?  It comes back to what I value most: Family, Connection/Community, Generosity, and ME.  A happy life is when I am living in the flow of these values I cherish.

What do you value?

There are so many definitions of what “happiness” is…  What it boils down to is what is YOUR definition?  No one can define it for you.  No one can tell you how to live it.  Only YOU can create happiness in your life.

“But happiness always eludes me!” I hear a voice pop into my head, this is a question I feel someone may ask as they are reading this.

Reframe that thought…

“Happiness is mine to receive, I deserve happiness and I have experienced happiness.”

Think back to a happy moment in your life…

What were you doing?

Who were you being?

Where were you?

Who were you with?

Now notice how you feel in this moment, remembering that “happy” thought.

And most importantly SMILE…

To give you an idea of how I just utilized the questions above to put a smile on my face and remember a happy moment.

This is a happy moment for me, the day I met Robert Holden in Vancouver with my dear friend Farhana Dhalla.

What were you doing? I spent a delicious weekend with Farhana, who had recently moved from Calgary to Vancouver.  I missed her dearly and this was a fantastic opportunity to BE with her.  I had just experienced one of the most incredible, out of this world like, happenings of my life – Michael Buble recorded a song for Sandra.  Bittersweet joy and emotions filled me that weekend, as I knew Sandra was dyeing, however I was so happy that her dyeing wish had been granted by the kindhearted Michael Buble.

Who were you being? ME, reflective, playful, authentic, open and honest.

Where were you? Vancouver at the I Can Do it Conference.

Who were you with? Farhana, Farhana and more Farhana.  And yes, there was some of the greats who have inspired me on so many levels – Dr Wayne W. Dyer, Louise L. Hay, Caroline Myss, Doreen Virtue.  And the two biggest surprises and gifts for me were two people, who I humbly admit I had not heard of Robert Holden and Cheryl Richardson.

How I feel remembering this moment? Filled with gratitude, love and joy.  I feel blessed to have experienced such an incredible weekend.

Take yourself back to a moment of happiness – it’s that easy.  You have been happy, you have experienced happiness.

It’s yours for the taking.  Duplicate who you were being, who you were surrounded with and take one step today to do something that brings you happiness.

Hugs & Love

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