Supporting a Loved One with Depression


I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone.  People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. ~ Maya Angelou ~


You are at a loss, feeling helpless and frustrated and not knowing what to do – your loved one is desperate, emotional, not themselves, withdrawn, fatigued and has no energy to do things they would normally love doing.  What do you do?

How Can You Provide Support for a Loved One with Mental Illness?

Ask your loved one what you can do to help them – they may not be able to give you a straight answer, however, by you asking it let’s them know you care.  They are more than likely feeling alone, desperate, isolated, frustrated, overwhelmed and helpless. Your unconditional and loving support will not fix them, however it will definitely help!

Seek Professional Help:

Accompany your loved one to a Doctors Visit: encourage them to be completely honest with their Doctor on how they are feeling.


Unconditional Love, Acceptance & Compassion:

A large part of the stigma that surrounds mental illness is judgement.  The majority of people won’t open up about where they are at in fear of being judged.  The biggest gift you can give your loved one is acceptance & compassion, refrain from using terms such as “Just snap out of it”, “you’ve got so much good in your life how can you be depressed?” believe me – I wish I could have “snapped out of it”


Practice Active Listening:

Allow your loved one to share how they are feeling, and to speak, without any interruption – with full attention and intention to fully hear what they are saying.



Celebrating what may seem something so small to you, can go a long way for your loved one – being trapped in a negative stream of feelings and emotions is normal in mental illness, gently point out small positive steps.


Overcoming Being Overwhelmed:

The simplest of tasks will more than likely cause overwhelm for your loved one, giving them too much information, will cause them to withdraw.  Keep things simple, short and sweet.



As a caregiver you also need support, be willing, ask and be receptive to others giving you the support you need.



Encourage your loved one to create an Emotional Health Plan – their support team: friends and/or family that they trust and have their best interests in mind.  Make sure there is a mix of personal and business support.


There is a full chapter on how to Support a Loved one in my book “A Quiet Strong Voice: A Voice of Hope Amidst Depression, Anxiety, and Suicidal Thoughts.”


This too shall pass, by accepting and providing unconditional support you are helping your loved one.  You will also be more aware and knowledgeable on this disease that affects 350 million people across the world.  Thank you for being there for your loved one, without my support system I would more than likely not be here today.



Mood Disorders Society of Canada – Support for Families and Quick Facts

Distress Centre – 24-hour crisis line – 403.266.4357 (HELP)

International 24 Hour Crisis Lines – International Association for Suicide Prevention

Centre for Addiction and Mental Health – Support for Postpartum mood disorder

Worldwide 24 hour Crisis line LISTINGS




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